藍天群青・・・ (Indigo ultramarine)
As the color of a sunny day (藍天) and the dark blue of a night sky (群青), an example of counterfeit.
From Kato Shigeaki's dictionary*
Some years ago I was watching "Waratte iitomo!" and that's what happened. During the Telephone Shocking Corner there was, if I'm not mistaken, a young boy and Tamori-san asked to this guest: "What do you do usually?" and the boy answered: "I go out always with the same friends, of course". Then Tamori-san inquired again: "Don't you ever go somewhere alone?" but he said: "But I hate to be alone~". Hearing that Tamori-san said something peremptorily.
"That's no good. Being an adult also means to not always team with others".
I thought that he was right. In other words, turning things around, it's that "being adults" equals to "being alone". This doesn't mean that we shouldn't have friends and become lonely though. 藍天群青. It's only that psychologically "to be adult" is a perfect match to the words "to not team".
I have a friend that once said this: "To become excellent you have to become lonely".
Bringing out last essay's argument again, an excellent human being has to study and do his best struggling with solitude and the temptations that come along, he has to use his time profitably. As a matter of fact, the biggest enemy when you want to fulfill, achieve something is surely the loneliness. You need to overcome it, if you can't stand it that's the end. The expression "To stand out" means to raise oneself above the crowd. Literally it means that when you want to go leaving behind the group you have to be able to bring up by yourself a power strong enough to overcome the power of many people gathered. If you can't do this you can't "stand out".*
I have many friends. Really. But we aren't closely connected to each others. Sometimes it happens that we are all together by accident but we aren't an only big group. Moreover there are people whom I meet only once a month, somebody even only once a year. But still we're friends. When we're free and we're able to talk to each others I can find once again my respect for one of them, or realize another time how stupid he can be. Ah, in a good meaning of course.
That's why I never thought that I'm part of a group. With this I'm not saying that I'm against people who always get along with the same group of friends. Because I know it's enjoyable. It's just that right now I don't want to depend on that. To build a trust relationship with somebody is important but we also need to create some time for ourselves. You can't advance always going at the same pace of other people. I'm really scared at the thought that doing like that I may become a very boring person. How can the others face somebody not able to face his own self? Other people must disdain a person who has no interests even in his own self.*
I'm talking so haughtily but loneliness comes at you suddenly like an earthquake. I often try to deceive it. I watch tv even if I'm not interested to it, I call a friend, I go out even if I originally had intention to stay alone, I go with some specific friends according to a fixed time.
It's just that I don't want to become "1" of the group. Each one in the group must be a "1". Moreover, I want to be together with myself. Since the beginning I'm also a NEWS.
In this era in which everybody is a hero fighting all the others, it's we who decide our own mean to survive.
We're 6 people in a group of 6. No, who said we can't become a group of 100?
